I love that your friends think I'm the perfect girl for you,and I love even more that you think they're right.I love that I can actually turn to you for help when I'm upset, despite, or maybe especially because of, the fact that you give the worst advice,like telling me to handle drama with my friends like the emperor from star wars.I also love that you think I smell like red kool-aid.

My best friend gets upset every year on the anniversay of her grandmother's death.
I don't even know the date of my grandfather's death,
but I do know the date of John Lennon's.
Now what exactly does that say about me?

the trick is to keep breathing.

it's nearly 2am, rain is pouring on the roof above my head, i've had somewhere around 6 cups of caffeinated tea, although i lost track a long time ago, and i'm taking a break from my still unfinished college essays to start some regular old high school homework. i've just discovered that i don't have any index cards to do this ap pg assignment on, and the ap lit hw is made difficult by the fact that i still haven't read more than a page of Heart of Darkness. i wouldn't even think about doing the ap lit hw if it weren't part of a group project; i don't think it'd be in my better interest not to come through for jacqui and emile. then there's the japanese quiz on god knows what tomorrow, and last week's ap physics lab that i really ought to finish. not to mention the problem set for ap physics due tuesday. i need to get a second job, and once regular apps are done i need to start applying for scholarships. i really don't think i'll be sleeping at all this month, but that's okay, i can hibernate once january comes. i'm sure my body will get used to running soley on caffeine in no time. i complain, but i really don't mind pulling all-nighters like this. i really do prefer my lifestyle of ignoring all my responsibilities and then cramming in all the work i have to do at the last minute. besides, i know i'll always pull it off and everything will work out in the end, because after all, this is me.

well, i've never much liked to be part of the majority anyway.

someday, we will live like rock stars.

but for now, we have to get into college.